Thursday, September 1, 2011

8 Shirts You Won't See on My Daughters

Well, holy crap.  JC Penney launched one of the most demeaning t-shirts ever created for girls this week. The Interwebz promptly freaked out, and Penney's yanked the shirt off their site within hours

In case you missed it, it looked like this:


JC Penney, girls' sizes 7 to 16.

Why, yes, it does say "I'm too pretty to do homework, so my brother has to do it for me."

Done throwing up yet?

Many people are wondering which robot monkeys approved this t-shirt for JC Penney.  After all, it's sexist, demeaning, and clearly not the kind of message any of us wants to send to our daughters, right?

Um, right?

If you're sad that you already missed the opportunity to tell your daughter she's a bimbo make everyone laugh, don't worry!  There's plenty more inappropriate crap insouciant wit out there for her, sized for infants all the way to juniors!


From Amazon, available as a onesie or t-shirt in sizes 6 months to 24 months.
Yay! Who doesn't dream of their daughter's future as a doctor lawyer teacher trophy wife?  (It's a nice career move when you're done pole dancing.)


Available at TwistedTwee.com. To be fair, some of their stuff is awesome.

And speaking of pole dancers, here's a charming shirt for toddlers with nipple tassels already attached!  Because it's just so hard to glue them directly to your child.  This shirt, after going viral in 2009, went from £16 to £516 despite still being a piece of crap because now it is a piece of art.


Kohl's, girls' sizes 7 to 16.
Daydreaming was my favorite subject, too.  Now I take Adderall for that.  On the other hand, maybe I should be encouraging my daughter to be proud of her Inattentive-Type ADHD.


Available at Kmart, juniors' sizes.
Awesome.  Can you major in that in college, too?  I'm sure there's good money and lots of careers available in ... Communications.


Another gem from Kohl's, juniors' sizes.
Oh!  It's hilarious on so many levels!  You're cheating on your boyfriend, and now you're going to have to cheat on your Algebra test because you didn't study.  See you on Jerry Springer.


Available at Target, juniors'.
I'm not even a religious person, but if I see this on one of my daughters, we're looking into convent school.


Available at Victoria's Secret PINK.
From the company that markets push-up bras in size 30AA for "back to school," comes this winner. I'm going to go ahead and ignore the panties that say "Earn that A" and "Extra Credit" on the butt.  Likewise the thong that says "Study Buddy."

53 comments:

  1. ROFL!!!!! Priceless crap LOTS of people are rushing out to google and buy right now! Thanks for providing the stores (maybe a link to BUY NOW would be better!) Looking forward to seeing the little tramps wearing these with their daisy dukes! On a more serious note DAMN JcPenneys was one of the last modest stores to shop at for my kids!

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  2. AAAAAAARGH!!!

    WTF? Are there any clothing designers, retailers out there with integrity anymore? With standards?

    My 4yo daughter is an absolute ball-buster already, and I hope her headstrong nature helps her resist BS like this. Gah. Must go wash my eyes out with bleach now.

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  3. I am so glad you posted this...it drives me crazy when I see T-shirts like this and I actually see them on kids more and more!

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  4. This blows my mind. I have a ten year old daughter, so it totally shouldn't. The crap they want these girls to wear is amazing.

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  5. Gah! Why? Why would you put your daughter into(or allow her to wear!) these shirts? This is insane! Sometimes I think the Amish have it right... ;)

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  6. I saw the JC Penny article this morning and was going to send it to you but alas, you're on top of it! I had not seen the others, but the black shirt just breaks my heart. I agree that these will not be on my daughter either and am thoroughly disappointed that they even exist. Thanks for the warning of where they are found!

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  7. This, and the fact that girl's clothes have turned into mini-hooker-wear, is why I make most of my daughter's clothes. The sad part is some people will actually buy these because they really think they're funny.

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  8. I want to put some of these on my son just to make a statement. Well, maybe not my son - someone else's, maybe.

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  9. i have a comment to make, but i had to wait for my fists to come unclenched first. burn it all down sistas! burn it all down! (may not be very constructive advice, but it made me feel better!)

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  10. I'm glad I have boys. Those shirts are insane.

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  11. This is seriously why I shop at Goodwill for my girls.

    And I need to add to this a tshirt worn by a mom at Kindergarten pickup yesterday that said, "I get drunk and hump things." Yep...nice.

    I also put your blog link on my FB page!

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  12. Don't worry, they make some stupid shirts for boys, too. I just pretend they don't exist. There's no way I would buy them for my kid. I am glad they don't make shorts with words on the a$$ for boys, though, cuz that's one battle I won't have to fight!

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  13. My daughter is only three so right now its pretty easy to find appropriate clothes if you stick to certain stores, such as Carters. I am kind of scared to see what things are going to be like when my daughter reaches ten; most of the kid/tween stores have clothes that make your kid look like she should be standing on the street corner! What happened to appropriate length of shorts and skirts? Is it me or do things get shorter every year?!? It drives me insane to see a child look like they should be working at a strip joint somewhere on the boulevard! My husband would strangle me and beat my daughter if I let her leave the house looking like someone who should be seen on the cover of a porno!!!

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  14. Holy Mother of Pearl!!!! Thanks for those gems Joc, I can't wait to see what my daughter wants to wear when she's 11. I remember being SO mad at my mom for not buying me some sweater shirt I wanted to wear as a dress. I have thanked her many times now for not getting it for me :)

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  15. I am still trying to pick my jaw up off the floor! I seriously get it. I have a 7 year old daughter who is VERY (and I stress VVVVEEEERRRRYYYY) into all the Disney shows and the clothes and styles and she wants to design clothes someday. Luckily, she is very Bohemian in her dressing style (and I LOVE IT!!) I can get one skirt (at Target mind you) that I approve of, and with all the tops she has gotten from her cousins over the past year, she is in heaven. I have given in a bought a couple tops with words on them though. One says "I love to shop". Kind of fitting for a clothes nut!! (And I haven't even mentioned her shoes!)

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  16. Dude. Seriously. This makes me so thankful I have three boys. I've always wanted a daughter, but if there's stuff out there like this... Well... I don't even know what to say.

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  17. They just had the homework shirt on the Today show, talking about how inappropriate it is. So glad I have a boy and will only need to worry about what kind if hussy he's going out with, not what he's wearing!

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  18. my son is only four, but already I point out girls dressed like that and say "you don't ever want to date a girl like that!"

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  19. It's amazing what the clothing companies will pass off as clothing these days. My 13 year old re-entered public school as an 8th grader this week.... after being homeschooled for 2 years. I'm SO glad that she's quite aware of what ridiculous things are on the store racks. She's got her own sense of style, doesn't care what "all the kids are wearing", and dresses beautifully... without the stupid slogan shirts. We DID however buy one of the shirts at the Glee concert with the "phrases" on them.... she got "Can't Sing".

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  20. Unreal! But sadly very real. Don't forget the morally demeaning shirts about boys. "Boys are from Jupiter because they're stupider" that girls wear (and parents with male and female children buy! And other crap like that. I don't even have a boy and I get al riled up!

    Thanks for sharing those fun shirts. I wonder how many parents will get all ticked off at grown men for looking at their daughters wearing the "I <3 to French Kiss" shirt? And, shouldn't that be a clue to you when your daughter does want that shirt? Might as well get her the tassle shirt too....

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  21. what a collection! i posted earlier this summer with my own list of shirts with crappy messages for girls:

    http://randomhandprints.blogspot.com/2011/06/skechers-has-company-two-and-half-more.html

    and skechers shoes are on my list too for thinking girls need to "shape-up"

    sigh.

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  22. Too. Much. Crap. being pushed at our daughters. Mine is 9, and quickly becoming a young lady. We've talked for years about which clothes are appropriate/inappropriate, and why. Thankfully she's been responsive and hasn't pushed to wear something I'd find offensive/demeaning/oversexualized. It's getting harder as she gets older, that's for sure. It doesn't help that she's leggy and pretty, and we'll have to buy a pit bull and name it Shotgun just to deter all the boys that will be driving into telephone poles and biking into walls as she walks by. But we've had conversations about T-shirts for our son, too - he's almost 13, and it's unbelievable the garbage we've seen printed on clothes for his age group and gender too. Some days I wonder if any designers and retailers actually have families of their own, and if they dress their kids in the slutty/rude/raunchy/demeaning/sexist/obscene clothes from their own stores.

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  23. Honestly, in shopping for my 7 year old daughter, I have *never* seen any of this. Know why? I steer RIGHT on past anything with words on it. She is not allowed (due to dress code at her school) to have anything with text, and I use that as my universal excuse when buying her clothes. In fairness to Target, I buy almost all her clothing there, and they have a very good selection of cute, modest (not Amish) clothing for 5-12 year olds.
    All of these t-shirts piss me off to varying degrees, but I have to say Victoria's Secret is officially off my shopping list forever. I used to really like their undies and bras, but damn... And I used to wonder why some of the girls in my classes at school (I went back to college for my Nursing degree) can hardly speak in full sentences...

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  24. the next generation is always going to have to shock the past generation. Intelligence is the only way to overcome stupidity, so lets stay active in our childrens education. The biggest thing that disgust me is underwire bras for little girls,wtf? underwire is bad for adults, hmm could that be one of the causes of breast cancer. Anyone who buys these for their little girls doesnt deserve to raise children, maybe their childrens children will rebel and wear wool sweaters.

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  25. As a member of the Boomer generation and an ardent feminist, I'm glad to see Moms today who draw the line at these sexist clothing lines. It appears that there are far too many who don't, which makes me sad and realize that the fight is far from over. With the upsurge in challenges to women's reproductive issues since the 2010 election, it's clear the cause of women's rights has not gained as much as we thought it had. Keep fighting ladies, keep fighting.
    ~physicsmom

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  26. I read a comment above about a mom at kindergarten drop off wearing the shirt with "I like to get drunk and hump things" on it. It reminded me of a shirt I saw on a dad at PRE-SCHOOL drop off. It had Bert and Ernie and the Count on it. I thought, aw, how sweet. A dad wearing Sesame Street...then I got closer. The count had shot Bert and Ernie and they were laying in a pool of their own blood. Nice for 2, 3 and 4 year olds to see! Morons.

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  27. Really? Businesses think mom's would line up to buy this trash? I'm appalled! In pure rebellion to JC Penny's shirt I read about this morning, I bought my girls a shirt made by Pigtail Pals! It says "Pretty's got nothing to do with it" on the front & "Redefining Girly" on the back! It's a T-shirt that every girl & mom can be proud of!

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  28. Think this girl's mum had her in that onesie?

    http://www.smh.com.au/entertainment/tv-and-radio/pageant-outrage-fake-breasts-and-bottom-for-girl-4-20110902-1jp0v.html

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  29. Wow....I'm reading some of the comments and seeing where people are mentioning porn???? Seriously.... You get that from these shirts? The only one I think is dumb is the tassel one. It's ugly. I think it's funny that parents don't keep open minds when it comes to their children.....tell a kid not to do something and make it seem wrong will most likely make it seem more appealing to them. I was raised by an old woman. I was told do what you want just use common sense and don't get in trouble. While all my friends, at the age of 16-17, were smoking and drinking I wasn't. It makes me laugh that theres this big of a fuss being made out of a few slogans on a shirt. If you don't like them don't buy them.

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  30. To the open minded idiot that posted 9/2/11 @ 6:48am...You obviously don't have children...and as far as the way you were raised...that's just lucky...didn't stop you from turning out to be a moron though...

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  31. Is it any wonder the US is behind other developed countries in math and s!cience?

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  32. I am so glad all my kids came out with penises. Can I just say that these are bad but what really dusts my doiley are the little firl's pants with words written across the butt! It should read "pedophiles look here"! And don't get me started on toddler bikinis! Again, glad my kids all have penises.

    Margaret
    @goodbadfamily

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  33. I have to admit, I covet a "Too Pretty to do Math" tee. But, that is as a grown up with a healthy sense of sarcasm. And, the Daydreaming one was so me. And, like you, I have lovely pills for that now.

    I think some of these are ridiculous in all situations, but some of them are funny if worn by the right person with the right attitude. But, I have a strange sense of humor and have collected sarcastic/funny shirts for years. I have passed that onto my boys. Haydn has one that says, "My mom said to spend more time outside" and shows a little stick boy with his video game hooked up, sitting in a tree. My littlest used to wear a tee that said, "I Still Live With My Parents."

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  34. I've never been happier to send my daughter to school in a uniform in all my life! Let's hear it for khakis and polos! :)

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  35. Wow I can not believe the ridiculous, unfounded, rude and small minded comments and conclusions you people can come up with! As a mother of a beautiful girl I would be appalled if some jack ass said she was destined to be on jerry springer, some strip club or a street corner prostituting just because of a shirt meant to be humorous and not taken seriously! Grnted I acknowledge some of these shirts push the line and at times cross it however texting, shopping, not liking homework etc. is not going to impede my daughters ability to be a smart and productive person when she's older...unless she's met by close minded people like some of those on here. Honestly don't buy therm if you don't like them but don't judge people who do because its called freedom of speech and freedom of expression! Go ahead and boycott shoppong at JC Penny but I am pretty sure they won't even notice. It is our jobs as parents to raise our girls and it's not up to what their shirts say to define them as people so if you can't realize that and teach them that then crawl back under your rocks :)

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  36. Dear Anonymous,

    Thanks for taking the time to read my humor blog and leave a comment. I think you mentioned something about freedom of expression? Yeah.

    Have a rainbow day!

    xoxo,
    SRMM

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  37. I put your post on my page, and one of my friends brought up the very valid point that some of these shirts are junior sizes and were designed with an older audience in mind than I had thought about when reading the entry. Neither of us could come up with an excuse for a shirt with nipple tassels, though. The tassels gotta go.

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  38. Um, also -- JC Penney DID notice the uproar about the shirt that kicked this all off -- and removed it from their stores. Of course they care about the messages they send, and they admitted that placing the "I'm too pretty to do homework" shirt in their merchandise lineup was a stupid thing to do. We MUST express our outrage when mainstream stores market items that are so offensive -- and thank you JC Penney for listening and choosing to act.

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  39. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  40. I freak out when I see an 8 yr old drinking a can of Pepsi! Imagine the stomach flips I can muster over tasteless (perverted) children's wear! Cripes! This world is going to hell in a hand-basket faster than I can burn all of my Rewards cards!

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  41. where does expression stop and sending bad messages start? thats my question... somethings are meant to be expressed. portraying yourself as 'too conceited to be educated' is not something i would want my daughter to express. just sayin. and to that reader on a soapbox, just like you have the right to buy your daughter things that tell the world that she likes to shop and text obsessively, we have the right to disagree with it. its called freedom of speech. freedom of expression. maybe if you werent to pretty to do homework, you would know that the whole 1st amendment right thing is for everyone! (and technically, freedom of expression is not in the first amendment.) dont like it? dont read it! keep on srmm! your blogs are great!

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  42. I don't care how old the wearer of these shirts are, they are demeaning to women in general. In a world where women are still 2nd class citizens and worse, we don't need more teenagers propagating "I'm too cute to be smart" messages. Ugh. Makes me sick, really.

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  43. BTW just because you have the freedom to express your opinion does not mean you are free from being judged by others for expressing that opinion. I can't imagine buying any of these shirts for my daughters, and don't find them humorous on other people's children and I've seen some excellent examples in my role as a middle school teacher. I would be first in line for school uniforms.

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  44. I could see something being funny on say a 6 month old that I would not let my buxom hormone filled tween or teen wear. Granted I should admit that I have three year old and I am anti her serving as a billboard for a company that does not pay us. So thank you target for sun dresses In 70's swirls... And god help me when she is old enough to argue, but I hope by then I will have brainwashed her (just as my mother did when I wanted a silk shirt declaring flirt across the frOnt of it) that we should not advertise for just anybody. Or declare to anyone that we are something for a day that we aren't normally. Our girls should be cherished and allowed to be young for as long as they can. Soon they will have boobs and it won't matter everyone (themselves included) will be trying to make sense of it all and where they fit. Why give them some third party silk screened t to help define themselves?!

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  45. I have always said, and will continue to say, Gymboree is the only decent line for girls any more! Anything else I've seen is just hoochie! Why must I see a shirt falling off my 8 yo on one shoulder? Or shorts that really should only be worn in the bedroom by.....HER MOTHER?! Ugh, these are gross. Especially the pasties.

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  46. Thanks uncool mom but even though I am a beautiful, stunning woman i hold several degrees and am very well educated and my point about freedom of expression and such was more in response to the callous ways people interpreted these shirts as a predictor of that girls future. Your freedom of speech does entitle you to disagree with me but does not give you the right to bully, belittle and nag at someone to make them see your point! Yes we all want our girls to thrive in this world but put your energy into educating them and not making such a huge deal over a homework shirt :) these kids are shaped by more than just the stupid t-shirts they wear and can be more than bimbos even if they hate homework

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  47. sorry if you 'feel as if you were bullied'. it was a post. people comment. when its a public blog designed for sarcasm and humor, its just that. and its open to all types of responses-harsh and not so harsh. dont take yourself so serious. you want the shirts for your kids, buy them. i have never been the type to force people to see things my way as we all have different perspectives. and i have always felt that different perspectives makes this world even more interesting, and we can learn from those that differ from ours if we keep an open mind. However, i will not refrain from responding to a public blog (that i happen to agree with) to avoid stepping on toes of -in this case- one person.

    and then we all live happily ever after shaking our butts in a 50 cent video...

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  48. Anonymous Coward said, "Your freedom of speech does entitle you to disagree with me but does not give you the right to bully, belittle and nag at someone to make them see your point!"

    Yeah, actually it does. Doesn't necessarily make it right, but it does give us the right to mock you for your short-sighted idiocy. Consider yourself mocked further.

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  49. I know this will sound odd, I can see two sides to this. I don't like the shirts, wouldn't buy them and think they should be removed from sale at once. Making/selling them was a BAD decision. BUT.. I am not too keen on making personal insults to a poster who expresses an opinion other than the rest of us. Hate the shirts sure, but a forum where only those who agree are allowed would be a boring and stifling place.

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  50. Hello (Original) Anonymous,
    While I do agree that these shirts are ridiculous, I also agree with you that there is no point in everyone agreeing with or parroting the initial statement in this thread. Afterall, does anyone read all 200 statements of agreement? Me thinks not. It's only when "Anonymous" threw some oil on the fire that this became an interesting and more dimensional discussion, worthy of SRMM resposting. Let's use our brains ladies, the ones we developed by doing all that homework!

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  51. Check out these shirts. They're way better.
    http://www.oneangrygirl.net/order.html

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  52. I agree with the poster who said, anything witha message on the butt is demeaning. HellOooooo, "Juicy"!? What's the message that's sending??! TMI....just sayin'.

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  53. I really don't see what the big deal is. Would I let my daughter wear them? Maybe the brother doing her homework, the texting one, the daydreaming one... and I would SO put my baby girl (She's almost 2 now) in that onsie if I would have found it.

    They are snarky and (IMO) funny. I don't think they are really anything to get that upset about.

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