Poll Instructions: Check off your TOP FIVE douchiest douches who did the most douching in 2010. Please note that there are twenty douchetastic choices offered; you have to scroll down the box to see all your douches. The poll will remain open all week.
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There were some that I had missed entirely during the year; how did I not know that Tiki Barber left his eight-months-pregnant-with-twins wife for a 23-year-old woman he met at work? Tiki was a star for the NY Giants, my husband's favorite team, plus he's a twin, and we actually own the book he wrote for children. So you'd think I would have noticed his name in the news. Twitter is my usual source for this kind of gossip and all I can say is, Twitter, you let me down. Please try to do better next time.
There were some stories I had tried to block out of my memory, like Michigan woman Jennifer Petkov, who bullied a dying seven-year-old girl; and Arkansas school board member Clint McCance, who publicly said that "f-gs" should "commit suicide." I feel strongly that in both cases, douchebag is completely inadequate to describe that evil dwelling within. However, actor and activist George Takei appears in this video in which he says, "Mr. McCance, you are a douchebag," so in they go to our list.
Some of your suggestions weren't included here. Take heart; we still agree about the douchiness. However, we decided to leave out minors, most admitted drug addicts, and most political figures.
Charlie Sheen, while clearly having some kind of "issues," was left in for partying with a hooker with his kids in the next room. Also? By "partying" we mean "locked a hooker in the closet, then ran through a restaurant naked while screaming the n-word."
The two politicians we left in had extenuating douchey circumstances: Sharron Angle, a candidate for U.S. Senate from the state of Nevada, while expressing her opinion that both maternity care and autism should not be covered by insurance, dismissed autism in "air quotes."
We also included Sarah Palin, not for her political views, but for dragging her children through the limelight in a reality show, in a way that the campaign trail did not. This exposure left her children open to attacks through Facebook, which subsequently became public. This publicity, in turn, resulted in her children being mocked Internet-wide.
Ladies and gentleman, these are your 2010 top douches. It was tough whittling it down to just 20, and we know the competition will be fierce to be in the Top 10. And who will win the coveted Golden Douche trophy for being the 2010 Douche of the Year? It's up to you to decide!