Now if only the whole family could just stay in the same outfits for the next three days, I'll be able to get packed for our trip.
Probably I only think I am caught up. There are, no doubt, stray socks hiding everywhere in our house. It's like a damn Dr. Seuss book around here. Socks on fox, socks in box. Socks on stairs and under chairs. Socks: They're not just for feet anymore. They're teddy bear hats and Littlest Pet Shop sleeping bags. The other day I found a sock full of craft loom loops. I have no idea what that was about.
Even when I finally get the laundry baskets empty, there it is: Gaahh! We're all wearing clothes! We're making them dirty right now. I hate laundry so much I would suggest our family adopt a nudist lifestyle, but I'm not confident that everyone's bathroom hygiene skills are good enough for that. I mean, I have no problem throwing out their underwear, but our couch is brand-new.
When Cookie and the Pork Lo Maniac were babies, Pampers came out with disposable paper bibs called "Bibsters." I sent them a letter and suggested they make disposable paper clothes.
Dear Proctor & Gamble, I like Bibsters a LOT. However, when my twins eat, they make a special kind of mess than cannot be contained by bib alone. I have taken to feeding them naked and then hosing off the babies and the high chairs afterward. However, this is not always feasible / appropriate, such as when we're eating out. Could you please make disposable paper baby clothing? You could call them BetterThanDoingMoreLaundry-sters. xoxo, Mommy.
Alas, they declined that suggestion, thereby missing out on a huge potential market of stressed-out mothers of multiples. Your loss, Proctor & Gamble.
I don't know about you ladies, but I know that when I'm at a friend's house, in between watching Oprah and eating Bon-Bons, I like to sneak off and check out her laundry. In fact, this is what we moms do: we judge each other based on the "gel-osity" of each other's towels. Especially the fancy embroidered towels in the guest bathroom.
You know what, Arm & Hammer? The only time I'm jealous of another woman's laundry is when her laundry is done.
i completly agree with you .. i have laundry and dishes ...in therory they are never done! we all have to eat and to be civilized we need to wear clothes. its never ending! drives me crazy to see ppl with their laundry caught up every day who has time for that. right now my laundry room is full over flowing into the bathroom with clothes that need to be cleaned. and where am i on facebook and reading a blog.. curse the internet!
ReplyDeleteI bet Gwyneth Paltrow is always caught up on laundry. Probably because her clothes never get dirty or need to be washed. Her kids either. Another reason to hate her.
ReplyDeleteMy favorite thing about that Lux ad is suggesting the man tell his wife. You know, since she can't READ.
ReplyDeleteRebekah, I don't think she sweats or uses the bathroom, either, which has to be a HUGE laundry saver.
ReplyDelete@Cathy, I know, isn't it great? That ad is from 1918. Oh yeah, THOSE were the good old days.
ReplyDelete@Rebekah, I'm positive there is no Evil Sock Monkey in Gwyneth's laundry room. Just adorable sock puppets that were personal gifts from Martha Stewart.
ReplyDeleteThe worst is when you wash the white load, and your picking up and sorting the reds and, behold, there are the 5 missing socks! Then you must decide: do I chance them turning pink and wash them now? Or do I have them lurk in the hamper until the next white load? Or, do I just shove them right back under the bed and Barbie bin and couch cushion where I found them?
ReplyDeleteOMG the socks! Sometimes I think I would rather buy everyone new ones every week than try to track them down.
ReplyDeleteI always say there are 3 things certain in life: death, taxes, and laundry.
ReplyDeleteOMG, truer words have not been spoken! I never get a handle on my laundry, it is the never ending chore!
ReplyDeleteWord. My mom has an obsessive compulsive need to empty my laundry hampers every time she's here. I've just taken to shaking my head and keeping my mouth shut. She doesn't seem to understand that before the last sock in the bottom of the hamper is dry, we've got SIX more complete outfits full of clothing waiting to take it's place. And that's ONLY if princess #3 doesn't pee in her panties (which is pretty much a certainty). It's a mocking, vicious cycle.
ReplyDeletethe visual of the sock monkey wearing the saw mask- this will be in my head every time I think of laundry.
ReplyDelete@Mommy of 2, Sorry about that.
ReplyDeleteI've got a total racket going on right now. I'm still working, because we haven't spawned yet. And if I leave it?
ReplyDeleteHusband will do the laundry on Saturdays.
I am going to miss that shiz when I quit work.
I live in an apartment that does not have a washer or dryer and yet at this very moment I could be doing any number of laundry related things.... sorting, folding, hanging, putting away... but I'd MUCH rather read your blog. Thanks for all the laughs.
ReplyDeleteOmg....you are cracking me up over here...lol! I have a two year old daughter and 6 week old twins. I do all the laundry in the house because my husband seems to think the laundry just does itself. I swear he will just wear dirty clothes instead of doing his own laundry like a big boy. I hate going into the bathroom when he's made a mess with the laundry because he once again likes to wear dirty clothes instead of just washing them. I swear it looks like gofers attacked my laundry. Anyway, I'm glad to hear there are other people who have loads and loads of laundry and are going through the same thing. Much respect to you for raising twins cause wow it's a lot of work. I love my little twinkles but wow how my life is now very very exciting 24/7. Thanks for giving me a good laugh before I go cry and look at all my laundry. That's awesome how you said the only time you are jealous of another woman's laundry is when her's is done..lol!
ReplyDelete@Anonymous mommy of 6-week-old twins: Oh, sweetie, please know that it does get better. You will someday get a decent night's sleep. Sort of. Can you believe I went on to have MORE KIDS after having twins? The thing that saved my sanity when I had Cookie and the Pork Lo Maniac was joining my local Mothers of Multiples club. It was, and still is, a terrific source of support. To find your nearest club, go to www.nomotc.org, and enter your zip code in the box on the right.
ReplyDeleteCongratulations on your babies. The laundry will always be there but they will not always be this tiny.
Feel free to email me at Mommy (at) starkravingmadmommy (dot) com if you start to freak out.
xoxo, Mommy
My solution to the sock dilemma is buying one style sock for each kid. 7 y/o has JC Penny crew socks. 5 y/o has Gymboree that I found on sale. 2 y/o has Tagret white ones. Each kid has 7-10 pair. Makes laundry MUCH easier.
ReplyDeleteI don't "do" laundry in my house..I rotate it. It's never done so to avoid feeling like a total failure in that dept, I just rotate it from the hamper to the washer to the dryer to the bed to the dresser where it starts the never ending cycle over again. And the socks? Bought about 20 pair of the exact same ones for little man (who is now 3 inches taller than me and still growing). One of his lovely little quirks is that any string must be pulled, any small hole in a fabric must be enlarged 10x it's normal size. So I throw out about 2 or 3 socks a week and can match up the leftovers. I love the post about when the kids have socks on they must be going somewhere...lol. Same here, and when he gets home, off come the socks before he finds a string and we lose another one!
ReplyDelete